Monday, March 3, 2008

Your Personalized Soap Opera

There was a soap opera on when was eating lunch today. I only really remember one of the characters--the tall, ruthless business baron with a gray-haired mustache. He always eats at fancy restaurants and tries to beguile women even though he is way too old and smarmy. The thought came to my mind, there could never be such a person in my life. And I wouldn't be afraid of him! Let him have another glass of wine, and shine his debonair teeth. He ain't gonna get the kind of girl I'm goin' for! But I got to thinking, what kinds of people would be in my soap opera??

1. The copy room saboteur. He (or... she) is the one who I should be suspicious of for trying to ruin my day by sending HUGE files to the printer, effectively bringing the printing queue for the ENTIRE second floor faculty and staff to its knees it for hours, or using up all of the staples in some of the staplers and jamming all the rest, or not putting the paper in with a slight arch upwards so every 5th sheet jams, and never in the same place. I can see it now, said saboteur is actually possessed with red eyes, probably a former love interest of mine who I spurned (in this case definitely a girl, and likely fictitious since I don't recall having spurned anyone whom I was once interested in), and who is desperately trying to get me kicked out of PhD school so I will spend more time with her / so she can reap her vilest revenge on me. Probably both at the same time.

1 comment:

AmyNPyper said...

I love that you used smarmy...and correctly! As for your copy room saboteur-I'm sure there is a girl, someone who feels like she's been spurned (whether intentional or not) and therefor feels vindicated in her attempts to ruin your life. You really should be more careful...you never know when you might inadvertantly create your own issues.
~Pyper